Wives!!! Does your husband feel respected?
The first duty of love is to listen.
Are you a married woman? Does your husband often say words that hurt your heart? He may think that you are not a good wife. The following is 10 important tips that will help you be a good wife.
- Be Respected or Be Appreciated
First, before you can share, you have to know who you are. In a marriage, there is only a single leader and follower. Husband is generally considered to be the leader and wife as the follower. It does not mean to underestimate woman. But, this fact is found in society.
Man, as the leader, wants to be respected and woman as the follower has to be appreciated. If you set your family in contrary, you have to keep the integrity.
- Care the Feeling
Avoid what you do not want. All the energy in you, either as feminine or masculine, has to support you to get a good feeling to do a good thing. Do not think negatively. If you do not want to do anything, do not do it. You have to respect yourself.
- Maintain Your Body
Keep you body to stay attractive. Aging can come to everyone, but you have to care of your own self. You may have already heard that love is blind, but men are not blind. Your husband can recognize what he wants to touch, especially your body.
Keep a good communication with him. Let him know what you want and what you do not. And you have to know what he wants and what he does not. Good communication will help you.
- Do not refuse to make love
It is important for you to keep in mind that sex is man's need. Therefore, do not refuse him if he wants to make love with you. You can have it at least once in a week. Refusing sex will disturb your relationship. You can also initiate to start it. Before you start it, it is better for you to convince that your husband want it too. Give a romantic signal for him.
- Spend your time at least 15 minutes a day to have a conversation
You can talk about anything. It can be about what you feel at that day. It will be important for you and for him.
Try to help him reach his goal and make him feel good. When your husband is respected, he will feel appreciated. On the other hand, when you are appreciated, you will feel respected.
Every time you do something, make an evaluation, at least once in a year of your marriage. Spare your time but not when you are eating or sleeping.
- Keep the commitment of your marriage.
You can keep your commitment by respecting and appreciating each other. Do not give up but if he makes you hurt, tired or even crazy. Nothing is perfect. If the level of the perfection is 51%, go on with him.
- Make a romantic memory
You can do this by giving a surprise gift for him. You will miss each romantic memory you have so that you can do that again and again.
- Give an appreciation and loyalty.
At 40, man usually needs to be more appreciated. On the other, woman needs to be more respected. Therefore, you have to prepare for your brighter future and be a good and loyal partner.
Does you husband really feel respected?
Mutual respect in a marriage is a key to lasting intimacy. However, often in marriage coaching, I find that one or both partners believe themselves to be truly better than (maybe even superior to) their partner. Not just better at certain tasks or skills…but better as a whole person. This is what leads to the idea that if only one's partner could be "fixed" then the partnership would be happy and successful. The nonverbal messages comes across to your mate, “Your broke. You are fortunate to have me as a mate…I can fix you!” This message undermines intimacy. It’s impossible to have a mutually intimate relationship with someone who does not respect you or if you do not respect your spouse.
Most people aren't broken and if they are it isn’t the role of the spouse to point it out and make them a project. Most of us are fully functional as human beings and we know it. Life was working before we married our spouse and will continue to work even if they are gone.
Respecting your spouse has to be built on the recognition that he/she is a fully functional and remarkably capable person. You spouse may not be as good as you are at organization, or baseball, or cooking, or gardening or whatever. But, guess what? You aren't as good as they are at many things. Which of you is better? Respect means being truly interested in how your spouse feels and thinks about a topic, and allowing them to have their own set of values, beliefs, likes and dislikes. Respect means that your spouse’s opinion matters, even if you disagree with it. Respect means allowing your spouse to live with out being made to feel "less than" for their choices. Here are some coaching tips to communicate respect to your spouse and build intimacy in your marriage:
- When meet your spouse for lunch, you are on time.
- You publically complement your spouse’s on his/her opinions
- You consult with your spouse when making decisions that will impact them
- You go out of your way to please your spouse and do things that make them feel
- You remember your spouse’s birthday, anniversary, and other special occasions
that are important to him/her.
- Your spouse encourages you when you face difficult situations and struggle with
- Do you feel respected by your spouse?
- If the answer is “yes” share with your spouse things they do to make you feel
- If the answer is ”no,” talk with your spouse about the behaviors that cause you to
- Talk about things you both can do to make the other spouse feel respected.
The Language of Love and Respect: Cracking the Communication Code with Your Mate
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