Did you know there are studies out there that indicate a man's ego is not as strong as a woman's? What the studies indicate is that if your husband were to have lunch with an ex-girlfriend in the general course of activities, you would be less likely to feel threatened by it. If you had lunch with an ex-boyfriend, your husband is more likely to feel threatened and intimidated by it.
What Does Our Ego Do?
Our ego is what plays host to our self-worth and our self-confidence. The male ego is considerably more fragile than the female ego because women cope with emotional upheaval far easier than men do. When a man takes a number of emotional blows, his ego is going to suffer for it.
Our ego is also responsible for how we cope with blows to our self-esteem. For example, women often network their emotional needs. They have their mother, their sisters, their friends and even their co-workers and more. They benefit from this network and it helps to reinforce their own personal viewpoint. Men on the other hand do not seek their emotional fulfillment from a network of other individuals. They get their emotional viewpoint from how their spouses and their families view them.
The Ego Explains a Man's Need to Provide
If a husband doesn't feel like he is fulfilling his wife's emotional needs or that she is seeking fulfillment elsewhere it can damage his ego and the relationship by default. Still, the ego is a difficult thing to judge because it varies from person to person. The ego is important to our viewpoint, to our self-love, our self-image and our self-esteem. You need to respect the ego in yourself and in your spouse. In turn, they need to respect yours.
If your spouse's actions damage your ego, you need to talk about that with them. You need to clarify the subject and the reasons why it is hurting you for both yourself and your spouse. It's important to recognize this isn't about a popularity contest, but when your ego is damaged - it's going to color your perceptions with regard to your spouse, your relationship and any other problems they have.
Don't ignore the potential problems of your ego or your spouse's. Put it on the table, address it and respect their feelings and your own. Protecting the ego can help protect your relationship from inadvertent damage and resentment.
Have you ever coped with an ego problem before?
Illustration from Clyde Mendes column at MetroSexual LA