| || || | They say the majority of human communication is done in silence; the quirk of an eyebrow, a twitch of the lips, a finger on the cheek, and a raised eyebrow -- it all conveys messages that would require several verbal sentences. Therefore, no matter how smooth a talker you may be, no matter how many pickup lines you have in your repertoire, and no matter how skilled you may be at listening, it’s all for naught if you ignore body language. You must become a student. You must sit back and observe, subtly, of course -- and keep an eye on her hands, arms, shoulders, face, and even her feet. There is an inherent benefit to doing this: While it can be difficult to decipher words, especially when it comes to women, the body rarely lies. In other words, what she says and what she does can often be two very different things.
Watch the eyes
By far the most expressive part of the face, the eyes tell all. Learning to read her body language starts with the eyes. Skilled Players can learn all they need to know simply by reading the woman’s eyes. It can be challenging, but there are a few simple rules. If she continues to meet your eye throughout the course of the conversation, she certainly wants to hear more. On the other hand, if her eyes are darting all over the place, she’s either completely uninterested or she’s scanning the bar for a better companion (or both). Furthermore, you may notice that during times when you decide to compliment her, she ends up looking at her feet; this is a sign of appreciative embarrassment. Oh, and if she casts you an up-and-down sizing-up glance more than once, she not only likes what she hears, but she likes what she sees.
Keep your distance
It’s often best to keep your distance initially, thereby allowing you better access for viewing her entire body. The Player in you will see this as an obvious benefit -- you didn’t approach her for her personality -- but you kill two birds with one stone using this tactic. Firstly, in not getting too close and fawning all over her, you’re respecting her boundaries and remaining a perfect gentleman. Secondly, selecting an appropriate distance will allow you to check a few things: Is she shuffling her feet? That’s a sign of nervousness, and it’s a good sign. Is she tapping her fingers on her thigh? Bad sign. Learn how to read her body language, and just be sure to remember the “appropriate” part: Stay too far away, and you’re just a lunatic.
Well who cares whether she is interested in you or not? You will soon get her interested in you! But why not have fun along the way? Watch her body reveal her thoughts as she moves from indifference towards affection. Here are some of the most obvious things you could be looking for!
- Big smiles with upper and lower teeth showing with a relaxed face.
- Biting of the lips or showing of the tongue, licking her lips or touching of her front teeth.
- She wets her lips, some women use only a single-lip lick, wetting the upper or lower lip, while others run the tongue around the entire lip area.
- She puts her fingernail between her teeth.
- She protrudes her lips and thrust her breasts forward.
- She gazes in your eyes with deep interest and her pupils are dilated.
- She raises both eyebrows exaggeratedly for a couple of seconds, this is often combined with a smile and some eye contact.
- She winks at you while talking to you or winks at you from a distance.
- While talking to you, she blinks more than usual, fluttering her eyelashes.
- Eyebrows raised and then lowered, then a smile indicates interest in you.
- She pushes her fingers through her hair. This can be one hand movement or more of a stroking motion.
- She twirls her hair around her fingers while she is looking at you.
- She is throwing her hair back off her shoulders.
- If she is wearing clothes that show her nipples underneath and you notice they are getting perky and erect.
- The hem goes up to expose a little more leg.
- She is fixing, patting or smoothing her outfit to make herself look better.
While she is seated:
- She moves in time to the music, with her eyes on you.
- She starts sitting straight up and her muscles appear to be firm.
- She is sitting with her legs open.
- She sits with her legs crossed in a manner to reveal her thigh.
- Her legs are rubbing against each other.
- Her legs are rubbing against the leg of the table.
- Her crossed leg is pointed towards you or if that same leg is rocking back and forth towards you.
- She exposes the palms of her hand facing you.
- While talking to you, she rests an elbow in the palm of one hand, while holding out her other hand, palm up.
- She rubs her wrists up and down.
- She sits with one hand touching one of her breasts.
- She rubs her chin or touches her cheek. This indicates that she's thinking about you and her relating in some way
- She is fondling keys, sliding hands up and down a glass, playing with toys or other things on the table.
- She plays with her jewellery, especially with stroking and pulling motions.
- She touches your arm, shoulder, thigh, or hand while talking to you (in case you already haven't started yourself, dumbass).
- She is pretending to look at her watch as you pass her.
- She raises or lowers the volume of her voice to match yours.
- She speeds up or slows down her speaking to match yours.
- She laughs in unison with you.
- In a crowd she speaks only to you and focuses all of her undivided attention on you.
- She mirrors your body language and body positions.
- Her skin tone becomes red while being around you.
- She blows smoke straight out from between her lips and toward you.
- She leans over and speaks into her friend's ear, just like in junior high school.
- She is standing with her head cocked slightly at an angle, one foot behind the other, hips slightly thrust forward.
- At a party - every once in a while she seems to appear out of nowhere in your vicinity and if you move to another spot, soon she appears out of nowhere again, you catch her glancing in your general direction (actually, glancing at YOU dummy!:), she bumps into you. accidentally, touches you. accidentally etc:)
When talking to a girl, these are some of the more important signs to watch for:
- Can you keep conversation going with her?
- Does she react well to Does she touch you?
- Does she laugh?
Well if the answers to most or all of these questions is "YES" you really don't need further guidance. do you?
Illustration from Clyde Mendes column at MetroSexual LA