Parenting Teenage Boys

Published on by CMe


Teenage years are termed as one of the most difficult phases for parents as well as teenagers themselves! As young boys approach their teenage years, there are many changes they go through, emotionally and physically. Often, parents grumble saying, ‘Oh! Just look at him. He isn’t the same like he used to be before’ or, ‘He has just gone beyond my control’! Well, the truth is, parenting teenage boys is not an easy task but blaming these youngsters is not the solution. Helping troubled teens overcome their many problems is a major responsibility that lies solely with parents. How many parents actually spend quality time with their children? This is a main question parents need to answer themselves. Parenting teenage boys is an effort parents need to make on their own. Try to look at the root of the problem instead of worrying about the same. Remember, you were also a teenager once, so relating to their pressures and problems should only make it easier. Boys are as sensitive as girls, and sometimes they do not really show their feelings. Therefore, you need to know which are the common worries faced by such troubled teens.

Common Problems Faced by Teenage Boys

  • He is always worried about peer pressure
    Teenage boys usually face an identity crisis especially when thrust in a group. This leads to a lot of unrest and worry in his mind when he feels ‘out of place’ with his group in high school. Many teenage boys are unable to handle peer pressure. They cannot tackle pressures in school combined with a worry of being ‘accepted’ by the peers.
  • He is not popular and finds himself unattractive
    Popularity during teenage years is one of the most important things for young teens. This is the time when young boys are conscious about many things. Many boys secretly love being the center of attraction but fail to do so; thereby they start feeling low as their confidence level sinks. This is the time when boys are particular about their looks. A simple thing such as wearing reading glasses may give such boys a major inferiority complex. Being accepted by and looking attractive to members of the opposite sex is always on the minds of teenagers. Lack of this causes them to feel troubled at all times. Teen obesity is also one of the reasons what causes teens to worry.
  • He is worried about his grades
    A teenager will always feel the pressure to perform excellently in his subjects and other extracurricular activities. With increasing demands from parents and teachers, teenage boys often face depression. Teenage boys tend to feel more stressed and troubled. Besides, when the grades still don’t reflect their hard work, they tend to be more stressed than before.
  • He is into drugs, drinking and smoking
    Teen smoking, alcohol addiction and drugs are the most serious issues ever. Teenage boys and even girls, who are depressed and not confident about themselves, often tend to try drugs and smoking. Sometimes, these young minds become pressurized to try it when friends compel them. To be ‘in’ with the crowd, these youngsters opt for extreme means without realizing the terrible consequences.
  • He is rejected by his lover
    Teenage boys who face rejection in matters of love and relationships can suffer greatly if they are not emotionally strong. Due to issues related to teen dating, they tend to lose focus on studies and activities. Their performance suffers subsequently. These troubled teens may opt for extreme measures to solve these issues.
  • He comes from a separated or disturbed family background
    Teenage boys may sometimes suffer silently when there are major family problems. Parents who continuously bicker only end up affecting the minds of teenagers. These young boys need plenty of love and care. Any compromise out here and they tend to feel unwanted and become emotionally weak with time. Separations and divorce often affect the minds of young boys causing them to withdraw into their shell.

Parenting Teenage Boys: Helping Troubled Teens

  • Shower loads of understanding and love
    While teenagers are growing up, they need plenty of love and care. You must show how well you understand him and problems faced by him. You need to show appreciation for what he does even about insignificant issues. This will help him to place his trust in you and open up about issues that stress him. He needs a companion and friend and you need to offer him friendship from your side.
  • Always have a positive approach
    A positive approach is bound to help you overcome many basic problems faced by teens. A positive attitude will help parents instill confidence amongst teenagers and make them comfortable. Be genuinely concerned instead of becoming hyper or disgusted when they land in trouble. They need care and support and need to be told gently how they can avoid these basic problems in the future.
  • Develop a healthy environment
    Parents who basically bring their children up in an unhealthy environment should realize they are hampering the child in the long run. Parents need to create a healthy surrounding for proper development of the child. Teenage boys may tend to feel insecure especially when parents don’t get along with each other. Show love towards your child and avoid all the bickering. Instead, be honest about your feelings and trust your son by having a healthy and mature talk about issues that concern the family.
  • Be an excellent role model
    Troubled teenage boys may face a variety of problems during their growing years. However, you can help them by setting a good example so that they do not choose to behave wrongly. When parents serve as role models, teenage boys and girls will always look up to them and emulate their behavior and habits. This reduces their feelings of insecurity and lack of confidence. When you share a good understanding level, your son will always confide in you whatever may be the situation.
  • Communicate strongly
    Discuss with your boy and make him talk. Remember, you have to make him feel comfortable and secure when he is confiding in you. Strong and clear communication from your side will make him feel secure about trusting you. Talk about important issues related with sex, drugs, alcoholism and effects of smoking. Make sure you do not nag. Be calm and treat him in a mature way. With communication, you can clear many doubts in his mind, making life much easier for him. Puberty is also the time when hormones play havoc with the mind. Make him realize that the changes in his body and his feelings are natural and discuss openly about such issues.

Parenting teenagers will require more than just your time. It will require you to be his friend, philosopher and guide! This is when you can help him overcome his emotional problems and make him feel comfortable with himself. Parents as well as teens can enjoy this beautiful relationship and cherish the memories of growing-up years forever!  That's My Son: How Moms Can Influence Boys to Become Men of Character
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