Starting a new relationship with someone is exciting and fun, and as time goes by, the relationship will grow and become more serious. Depending on how much you wish to share with each other, past relationships may creep into the web of your current relationship. Whether you are friends with your exes or you are not, there may be feelings of inadequacy or anger at various points because of past relationships. Overcoming these relationships with your new partner will be essential if you want to remain healthy and happy.
- Be honest with your partner. If you decide to share information about your past with your new partner or if the two of you knew each other before and already know information, remain honest at all times. If you lie about something, your partner will most likely find out and be angry that you did not tell the truth. Honesty will allow both of you to deal with any unpleasant feelings at the time and move on.
- Confront any unease or anger from the start. Avoiding it and claiming that things do not matter if they were in the past will only allow the issue to fester. If you force yourself to deal with any issues straight away, greater understanding and trust for each other will be gained.
- Introduce your new partner to your ex as soon as you feel solid with your new partner. If you are still friends with an ex, your new partner should be guided to feel comfortable and content in the situation. The longer you wait, the more awkward it will become, and the more suspicious your partner will feel. Basically if you are friends with an ex, your new partner should be friends with him as well.
- Respect your partner’s emotions. If something is upsetting, allow room for that and deal with it through communication. Do not assume that your partner will feel exactly as you feel about something, and do not brush off any emotions that your partner may have.
- Avoid constantly talking about experiences you had during past relationships. Instead create new experiences with your partner and enjoy your current life.
Illustration from Clyde Mendes column at MetroSexual LA