Having intimacy in a marriage is about more than just sex. It is being able to be with someone in a way that you can't with anyone else in the world. It is knowing things about that person that no one else knows and sharing things that no one else shares.
With intimacy and living together comes a deep knowledge of your spouse. While this is generally a good thing, it can sometimes have a downside when it comes to your sex life.
As any married person knows, there are things that you learn about your spouse that, well, are the mundane bits of being human that you might not have anticipated. I could go on, but let's just say they sometimes fall into the category of too much information. No, wait, I'll give you an example.
When you were dating, you might have had a day that you weren't feeling so well. You might have downplayed it all and either carried on with a smile or excused yourself and retreated to your own space. Nowadays, you think nothing of telling your spouse to hold the bucket while you throw up.
We tend to think that we know everything there is to know about our spouses, but the truth is that they are probably a lot more complicated than that, with dreams, desires and pasts that we actually may know very little about.
Doings something novel and out of the routine can spark new intimacy by having us look at our spouses in a new way or being in a place to reveal new things to each other. Novel in this case could be anything from acting out a secret sexual fantasy to going skydiving together. Taking yourselves away from the everyday routine of living in the same space may help your realize just how sexy you are to each other.
Illustration from Clyde Mendes column at MetroSexual LA