| || || | Even today, not many girls will chat up men or ask them out. For a start, they're brought up not to , and rejection hurts them much more than it does us. Plus they think if you're a man worth going out with you've got to have the guts to ask them!
What girls will do though is give off SIGNALS that they want to be chatted up. Most men don't know what these are. The secret to being successful is to know what these signals are and whenever you go out look out for these. If you get just ONE signal then swing into action IMMEDIATELY !
Remember, there's only one part of a man's body that most girls will melt for - and it's not what you think - it's your EYES. So, the first step to scoring is to make GOOD STRONG EYE CONTACT with any girl you fancy. It doesn't matter what you look like - If you have a good, strong gaze it can TURN HER ON. (Most men go wrong here - by looking at a girl's legs or breasts no way can you attract her to you.)
The minute you walk into a room start looking at every girl you fancy. Even if you think she's far too stunning to ever go out with you. And look at her eyes. Make full eye contact. And give her a smile too. Don't leer or glare. This is a sure fire way to get the chemistry going. It tells her she's under scrutiny and in this situation there is no way a girl cannot react one way or the other.
Finally remember - The best looking girls are often short of dates because few men dare to make EYE CONTACT with them. The better looking she is the more likely she is to warm to eye contact .
And How to Tell That She's Interested ....
You'll know immediately if a girl's interested. She'll look straight back, then turn away, and perhaps smile. If she fixes you in a steely glare it's probably not going to happen. IT'S THE TURNING AWAY THAT TELLS YOU THAT SOMETHING'S CLICKED.
There are other signs you should look for too. If she plays with her hair or jewellery , adjusts her clothing or breathes in (to show you how slim she is!) these are all so-called preening signs. They say that she's interested in your approach, and she's trying to look her best for you.
From a girl's point of view these signs say 'I'd like to talk to you !' SO IF THIS HAPPENS YOU MUST MAKE THE EFFORT TO TALK TO HER .
HOW TO ATTRACT GIRLS TO YOU WITHOUT SAYING A WORD
Again, YOU have to make the move - it's unlikely she will. I've talked to hundreds of girls and they all say the same - If you want to chat us up come and ASK - don't just stand there and stare. If you can, just walk over and talk to her. This shows real guts and confidence which she will admire. If you daren't then MAKE AN EXCUSE to walk past her - on the way back from the bar or the toilets etc. - and 'accidentally' bump into her. Successful men do this all the time. It's usually no accident and if you've read her signals right she won't mind a bit!
When you're passing the first rule is CATCH HER EYE AGAIN with a firm glance. (Just think, if you're in a bar how do you signal to the barmaid that you want serving? Well, usually you catch their eye. Picking up girls is not all that different.)
At this stage don't preen - such as mess with your hair or adjust your tie. To a girl these are obvious signs you are 'moving in' on her. Her immediate reaction will be to put up the defences, whether she actually wants to or not.
The second rule - saying ANYTHING is better than saying NOTHING. Every opening line seems stupid at the time but probably isn't.
THE SINGLE BEST WAY TO GET TALKING TO HER AND NEVER BE STUCK FOR SOMETHING TO SAY
Probably the single best way to get a conversation going with girls is to use PEOPLE TALK. Girls are naturally nosy and natural gossips. (Just look at the gossip stories in the mags they read.) So your opening chat should be about people - YOU and YOURS, HER and HERS, THEM and THEIRS. 1 don't know any girl who isn't interested in this sort of thing ! Try and get the balance just right. Too much about her seems nosy. Too much about you and you could appear big-headed.
Here are some good other subjects to talk about
- The News - Scandal and gossip stuff , not serious .
- Well known people.
What NOT to say : Anything she's unlikely to be interested in, e.g. football. No problems, moans or complaints. Stay away from those boring, worn-out openers like the time or the weather.
The next important technique you must use is to avoid asking her QUESTIONS which can be answered with 'YES' or 'NO'. If she just answers 'no' and your nerve breaks then you've virtually blown it. It's far better to say something to which she has to give a proper answer. Then USE THAT ANSWER TO BASE YOUR NEXT BIT OF CHAT ON. This way you should never be stuck for something to say because she will tell you what she wants to talk about without even realising it !
HOW TO SPOT IF SHE'S PICKING YOU UP
Girls hardly ever use an obvious pick up line with men. The female brain is far too complicated for that! But they DO things that say 'I fancy you'. Most men don't know about these or take them the wrong way. You must learn to spot them and act immediately
If a girl you've made eye contact with does or says anything that's not ACTUALLY NECESSARY or DOESN'T SEEM TO MAKE SENSE then she could be moving in on YOU. The following are classic signs:--
- She asks you the time when she's got a watch.
- She asks you for a light when she's got a lighter.
- She makes any sort of joke.
- She criticises your clothes/hair etc.
- She bumps into you accidentally ( a much more common female trick than you might think )
- She stares or looks you up and down then turns away quickly when you notice
- She 'preens' or laughs or smiles every time you break eye-contact .
If any of the above happen start talking with her straight away. SHE DEFINITELY WANTS YOU TO !!
Illustration from Clyde Mendes column at MetroSexual LA